Hey fellow Quilters. Now that Spring is starting to finally show her face, the annual spring clean has started. Today I wanted to talk about Loving the Alien (no not my favourite Bowie tune, although I could wax lyrical about how much I love Bowie, but that is not for this forum!) I am talking about those UFO’s. For those not in the know, UFO’s stand for Unfinished Objects. You know what I mean, those blocks you started and then decided that you did not like. Those samples you made when you were new to quilting and used polyester batting. And yes, those quilt tops that you just did not get around to quilting. We all have them. The secret stash of unfinished projects, hiding, unloved, in boxes, drawers, under the bed (all those places where we love to hide our “shame”). Here are a few examples of my own personal walk of shame.
I recently read an online article on letting go. Yes I know it was talking about the macro things in life, bad relationships, rubbish jobs, toxic friends and alike, but the advice struck a chord. Over the years I have fallen “in and out of love” with certain crafts, projects as well as experienced a loss of my crafting Mojo. As the title of this Blog entry suggests, I want to talk about how we can learn to love the aliens in our lives or learn to let them go and move on without any regrets.
The article I read suggested five steps. I am going to discuss in turn how these steps applied to my journey.
The first step was to Pay Tribute. In order to “pay tribute” I found it was cathartic to dig out all my UFO’s out and put them on show. I used my spare room but any space where you can really see them is key. Don’t be shy, remember that attempt at crotchet, get that out too. I’m talking EVERYTHING. Once you have all your UFO’s out, you can look at the positives of each. Even the Ugliest of UFO’s have positives. At the very least, they were stepping-stones in your quilting journey. After all, Rome was not built in a day! However, by looking at your UFO’s with fresh eyes you can sometimes fall back in love with those long forgotten pieces. For me “paying tribute“ lead me to find a long forgotten quilt top I started nearly 2 years, but put away as the fabric was “too traditional” for my then 1960’s prefab monstrosity of a house. However, now I have moved to an old stone house, the more traditional fabric seemed to “fit” with the house and I decided that actually I quite like it after all.
The next step, Cry when you need to, I felt gave me permission to “mourn the loss”. Although I have not cried over UFO’s I have often felt compelled to finish the project otherwise it would be a waste. A waste of effort, time and money, even though I have moved on and don’t like the pattern, fabric, style – whatever. That “shoulda, coulda, woulda” feeling has on occasion been so overwhelming that it lead to creative stagnation. By being so focused on finishing something that I don’t want to, I found the thought of housework is more appealing than sewing! EAAAAK I need to rectify THAT! So I decided to accept that some projects just won’t get finished and cry if you need to. These I put on the throw away pile.
The third step leads on from the acceptance started in step two, Focus on what you need — not what others think “you need.” In fabric terms, to me this means, don’t waste energy trying to love the Aliens you hate. Yes, I know I am a hypocrite, I held on and fell back in love with that traditional quilt. But I did not fall back in love with everything on my pile. There were UFO’s that just won’t ever get finished. So I focused on what I needed. I “cried it out” and moved on.
The fourth and Fifth steps go hand in hand, Focus on what you are gaining and Do something you love. Once you have decided which Aliens to love, the key is get it completed ASAP. Focus on the gain. For me it meant getting my traditional quilt top, long armed so I could bind it and use it. I know long arming is an expense but if I wait to become proficient at quilting something bed sized it will still be a UFO in another 2 years. For the other pieces, I set myself a strict target, get it made by X date or get it out. By clearing the UFO pile I am gaining lots of lovely new things such as quilts, cushions and table runners. More importantly, I am also gaining the headroom to start new projects and learn new skills. Even though there is every chances that some of them may be future UFO’s, as my skills improve and my tastes change. However, by following the basic steps in the future, I can let go of those Aliens I have outgrown, and learn to love those Aliens worthy of my time and efforts.
So there we have it. This is the tale of when Disney met Bowie and where I learned to “let it go” whilst “loving the Alien”. My next step is to work on my ever-growing overflowing stash. But that, dear readers is a tale for another blog.
Till next time Happy sewing.
Love Dotty xxx
I love how you have applied the Letting Go strategy to quilting aliens and UFOs. Its a nice easy step by step process, that I think it worth a try on my own stash.
I’m very glad you like it
Great read Rebecca – nicely written, very funny but with a deep, deep message – I loved it
Thank you
Really hit home – this one. I have some Aliens but also some UFo. I actually read this post this morning and then went and threw away a horror of a quilt top that I knew I should never have started and certainly won’t finish. THANK you for your post – it was just what I needed!
Well done! The first step is always the hardest