Day 36: Stem Stitch, light green wool,

Diary Entry: No lay in, did not sleep well again. I spoke to the consultant’s secretary this morning. They are going to see if they can get me an IBD -Irritable Bowel Disease -team. She understands that I was left a bit out in the cold with all this. I told her that the NHS was not open for those with lifelong conditions. We are are just left to die, or that is how it feels. Prisoners in our own home, out of sight and out of mind. I had Admin duties and our 11 am weekday day chat with ladies this morning, housework this afternoon, and pattern cutting into the evening. A nice shower, and an hour of tv before sewing my stitch of the day.

Stem Stitch, I like this stitch but find it a struggle to make sure it stays as it should. Happy with today’s small effort. I chose the wool, as I want a fuzzy look to the thread. Now I am just wiped out.

Day 37: Laid Work, blue two strand, and purple two strand embroidery thread.

Diary Entry: A rubbish night of no sleep until gone dawn, then the council cutting grass at 8 am was not a welcome sound. However, a productive day again; morning eleven chat, and then cracked on with tracing out the rest of the patterns. Took a while, then started on the fabric cutting. Only got two pairs of trousers cut out, will sew them tomorrow then cut the tops out.

The tent got cold towards teatime, so I cleaned up and came in. However, really enjoying the me time, my music choice and my own space. The Wednesday shop where hubby and Deanna go out is not quite as important for space now. Beginning to cope with routine, just have to learn to stop eating, chocolate, crisps, cake. Not good in more ways than one. Shaved Kiras hair today, so she is a lot happier. Her stresses effect me because they are so draining.

Today’s stitch is a little different from my normal approach. I have chosen laid work. Mainly because I wanted a contrast. It was meant to be a circle and, well it was not. Not to worry I went with the flow of it.

Off to bed soon, and hope to sleep. Take care and stay safe.

Day 38: Laid work continued. Three strand green.

Diary Entry: Another cold start to the day, the sun has gone and brought the damp cold weather, and along with it pain and fatigue. I could have done with staying in bed, but needed to make scrubs. Fighting fatigue, and the cold I did some sewing in the dinning room and not the tent, not much sewing space but warm. Today was the trade off, heat or space. Deanna and Aubrey were not out as long and I was about go down for a nap when they came back, full on again. So I figured I would try and continue with the sewing, managed to do a bit more but nowhere near where I would of liked to been at teatime, had a shower early tonight, so means I can sit and relax a fair bit more.

Stitch today was the finishing touches to my laid work, confessions, I did not realise it was meant to have the last bit added until tonight when I turned over the page. It is small couch stitches over the trellis.

Sewing bee tonight, cup of tea and cake, and sit and have me time some more. Tomorrow is housework, followed by pattern cutting trousers for an order. I may end up leaving it depending on my health. We will see.

Day 39: Straight Stitch, three tone, black, yellow, red and 6 strand threads.

Diary Entry: Thursday, housework again, the weeks are blurring into one, a working routine is a must. Aubrey covered the bathroom ceiling in PVA after scraping the peeling paint off for the last two days and driving me nuts with bits. Not all of them, just the ones he left me to clean up. He never seems to get all of them bless him. He works on the “if I cannot see it they are not there” principle. I had my day planned out; fabric cutting a pair of trousers, then chatty women, then housework. Then I time sewing. Instead chatted to a lady dropping stuff off, then chatty ladies, then housework and lunch. Was going to rest from scrubs but figured I would just cut the one pair of trousers ready to batch sew them when I was able. However, the tent was warm; I got with the music and was on a roll, cut the tops out the fabric as well, so now I have five sets of scrubs to batch sew. Was not what I had planned but it was, what was needed. Sometimes you just need to do it. I felt accomplished and despite a little pain, I was okay and relaxed. Tomorrow I may take a break from sewing them up and just enjoy the day. Will see how I feel. The tent is working out okay for my safe space but need to find the heater, as I do not want to be in pain with it.

Today’s stitch is straight Stitch, I started with the black and I was going to ziz-zag a second colour red within and then slip stitch a third colour over it. But I like the way the black looked, so I added red and then I remembered the coral snake and the rhyme, so added yellow. “If red follows black, you are all right jack, if red follows yellow, you are a dead fellow.”

I did not want it to be a snake but I love the effect of it. Just goes to show although not planned, it worked better then expected. Like my whole day, I have gone with the flow.

I think as long as I stick to some sort of plan for the day, it helps the days. Anything to help mental health.

Day 40: Running Stitch Whipped, yellow 6-strand thread, and green thin cotton thread.

Diary Entry: Up early and sewing in the tent, with a tent heater today. Got some done, but not as much as I wanted to. Just three pairs of trousers to hem and finish the waistbands. Then five tops to make. As much as I enjoyed the space and the sewing, tonight I feel a little melancholy, had a bath to relax, but just do not quite feel with it. I have done my sewing for today in the hope that would add clarity of thought like it sometimes does. However, tonight, the balance is not there.

I cannot believe it is forty days and forty nights in a very changed world. Scary. Maybe that is why I am feeling like I am. Or maybe I am just emotionally worn out with all the stuff going on. Hard to see an end to all this right now. This for now is the new normal. I have a job in lock down, sewing scrubs. I said to Hubby that although it was not paid it was still a job. I said he has to help around the house, as I will struggle to do it all. His said his job was responsible for paying the bills. Yes, it does, but he eats the food, uses the dishes and sleeps in the bedding. While he is not “out at work” and sat on the laptop most of the day. I do not think I am being unreasonable. I do not adhere to the woman does the stuff, equal. Besides I can’t always do all the stuff health gets in the way. I am lucky I have just managed to get stuff done thus far. Not been without pain and discomfort although I do not mention it twenty-four seven, it is still there. I hope tomorrow I can shake this feeling. Weighs heavy on my mind.

I have chosen running whipped stitch because I like the contract of over and under. In hindsight, I wish I had made them closer together, but I like the effect nonetheless.

Day 41: Overlocked and coverstitched, not a hand stitch in sight.

Diary Entry: Well after writing the entry last night I was having a group chat and somebody was on about making stuff for myself today. Then other person said they would be making pj’s. So I thought I could too. That cheered me up, sew for yourself Saturday. Challenge was getting to the fabric within my shed. It had all the scrub stuff in the way. I made some space within the fabric section of my tent, and put all the inventoryed items there, so when fresh “hot stuff” comes in I do not have to touch it for a few days. Once that was sorted, my shed felt like mine again. Then I found my stash of jersey and got busy playing and fabric cutting. I wanted long legs but there was not enough fabric to do a pair of trousers so I shortened the leg and made a type of Capri leg. After cutting out I went down for a nap, glad I did. I was wiped out form the late night.

Just as I was going to bed yesterday Kira fell down the stairs from the top, she just went down and slid on her back. Hubby had to drive her to A&E, as my battery in my car was flat. Deanna had to go in with her because she has Aspergers and would struggle on her own. I wanted to go but because of the tablets poor, Deanna had to do it. Kira had to have a head, neck, back anal hip X-ray because she is hypermoblie we never know what might pop out of place, and she doesn’t always say where it hurts. However, she is okay just bruised and tender.

Well after my nap, I made my pj’s up. Just using a overlocker and a coverstitch machine. Finally, some summer nightwear. They are in the wash to freshen up and then I can wear them with the fresh bedding.

Had a Chinese from tea, our local had reopened. It tasted great. So much happier today. Fulfilled and balanced again.

Day 42: Eye, eye straight stitch, sewing cotton. Baby Bullion Knots, light green perle thread.

Diary Entry: First of the month cleaning today. So not much, I time. When the coordinator starts off with “I know it’s a Sunday”, you know she wants something. Just simple stock take. However, I have told her repeatedly I am three days behind, as I will not touch stuff for three days. Then she wants the pre cut fabric back as I have not apparently sewn it fast enough. Told her it is being sewn tomorrow. Feeling pretty mad as we tell the others to do their best yet I am expected to rush and not have a life outside of this. Well sorry, but I need to find the balance as Sunday is my day off, I think I am entitled to rest where I can. I understand the urgency for these, but not at the expense of me going into flare. She properly saw that I have sewn myself a pair of pj’s and thinking if I can sew those then why not the scrubs. What she did not see was the days last week I spent sewing them. I am not a robot.

Today I finished the stitching side of my eye (Emily Tull, Stitch challenge week two), I will paint it next. Then on to the couching, with week three challenge.

Also today’s stitch is baby bullion knots as the buds, and some fallen buds on the floor. Things with buds if you nurture they thrive, if you do not they fall away. Same with sewing talent and ladies wanting to help with scrub making.